It took this long? We started our adoption process on August 31st. Here we are- December 2nd- and I am actually breaking down and crying...
I think it might be more of an emotional release, if anything.
I feel so inadequate. I don't have all the answers. I'm not super smart. I'm not multi-talented. We're not wealthy. Our home is small. All I have to offer a child is love. Is that going to be enough? Is that going to persuade a birth mother to choose us? Why do I feel like it won't?
How do I make a portfolio or write about ourselves enough to persuade somebody that we're worthy of caring for their child? How do I throw myself out there, so vulnerable, and let somebody see my heart, my true true heart... deep down. How do they see that?!?
I can't write things like "I speak several languages." Or "We live in a large, spacious home." Or "We have plenty of money to go around (and around and around and around)." What can I write that will show my heart? What can I say that is so honest and so intriguing?
God is my strength. God is my hope. In Him will I put my trust.
Phillip has been writing a personal statement for grad school, and he had tons of people look at it. It kept evolving and got really good. Also, a birth mother, even if she has so many hard things going on in her life to see clearly, would definitely be able to sense your love and goodness shine through in your writing, pictures, etc. That goodness even shows through any venting you might do on your blog, so don't worry. Just start with a prayer, put as much down on paper that you can get through yourself, and pass it on to others. The Holy Spirit will work on you to give you ideas so you can put together the best portfolio you can, and will work on the ones reading it so that the right baby for your family will make it to you. You already know that you will make fantastic parents, and God knows how to bring those babies into your home and will make that happen. If you want, I can look over what you put together, and can pass it along to friends who have gone through the adoption process, too.
ReplyDeleteoh, and i forgot to say i love your new header photo! so cute!
ReplyDeleteWow. Print out Kirsten's comments, dear Sarah! loveya
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